Just look at me. I care so fucking much.
So the other day I'm working front counter at McDonald's, and some fiftyish guy wearing an Ozzy Osbourne shirt tucked into his belted slim-fit jeans comes up to the counter and says:
"Yes, I'll have the bacon-egg-cheese biscuit but instead of the biscuit, I'd like a muffin [common request.]. It has less calories, fat and carbs, I get it all the time. And I'll have a medium soda with that [also a common request]. I don't drink coffee."
I've said it before, and I'll say it again: I DO NOT GIVE A FLYING CRAP ON A STICK ABOUT YOUR DIETARY HABITS. Do not give me your reasons for not wanting X item on your food unless you're allergic to it. I do not care. I don't drink coffee either, but I don't parade the fact around like some God damn beverage elitist. And as for the biscuit/muffin bit: if the butter slathered on the muffin doesn't cancel out the fact that the muffin is better for you than the biscuit, the heart-attack fiesta that goes in between the slices sure as hell does. If you're so concerned about your cholesterol levels, what the hell are you doing in McDonald's during breakfast in the first place?
I also love when someone comes in from drive-thru and starts bitching at me, the person behind the register at the front counter, as if I had ANYTHING to do with what goes into bags in drive-thru. Matter of fact...
ATTENTION ALL BITCHERS: Not that I'm racist or anything, but being black does NOT under ANY CIRCUMSTANCES give you the right to be rude as all fuck to anyone who so much as mildly irritates you. A while back some big fatass black lady comes in and bellows "EXCUSE ME! [pointing at me] YEAH YOU! WHAT THE HELL IS UP WITH THIS ORDER? I WANT TO SEE THE MANAGER! [I try to find Steve, but he's in the bathroom and the only available manager is Vanessa, who speaks okay English at best. I tell her.] "[to Vanessa, who's busy in grill] EXCUSE ME, MA'AM! I AM WAITING FOR YOU! MMM-HMMM!" [Vanessa finishes whatever she's doing] "IS THIS HOW YOU SERVE YOUR FRIES? THEY COLD!" [The woman had taken all damn day to pull up to the window, the fries were sitting there waiting for her, of course they're cold, damn it.] "IS THIS HOW YOU SERVE YOUR DRINKS? THERE'S NO ICE IN HERE!" [The ice had most likely melted while we were waiting for you, either that or the automatic drink/ice dispenser had missed the cup because it's so damn small and the DT people didn't notice.] "[Bitch bitch bitch, on and on and on]" Had she been reasonably polite and just told me what was wrong with her order instead of insisting on seeing a manager and being all bitchy and loud, she wouldn't have spent half as much time in there and we'd have all been much happier. Had we all been black, I doubt she would have been such a huge bitch. I've seen a lot of fat white people on the other side of the counter, but they NEVER act like that.
Another time, we ran out of sausage during breakfast. (Don't ask me why.) Some redneck white-trash guy comes in and asks for a sausage something-or-other, and Bianca tells him there's no sausage until we get a box from another store. His response (bear in mind that he had a kid in his arms, and another one standing with him): "WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT? YOU DON'T HAVE ANY FOOD, AND YOU DON'T HAVE ANY COMPETENT PEOPLE EITHER? THIS IS FUCKING STUPID!" Because, you know, when you swear at counter people they magically develop the ability to pull sausage out of the air, just for you, and also when the managers don't order enough sausage it's always because the counter people are incompetent.
"Yes, I'll have the bacon-egg-cheese biscuit but instead of the biscuit, I'd like a muffin [common request.]. It has less calories, fat and carbs, I get it all the time. And I'll have a medium soda with that [also a common request]. I don't drink coffee."
I've said it before, and I'll say it again: I DO NOT GIVE A FLYING CRAP ON A STICK ABOUT YOUR DIETARY HABITS. Do not give me your reasons for not wanting X item on your food unless you're allergic to it. I do not care. I don't drink coffee either, but I don't parade the fact around like some God damn beverage elitist. And as for the biscuit/muffin bit: if the butter slathered on the muffin doesn't cancel out the fact that the muffin is better for you than the biscuit, the heart-attack fiesta that goes in between the slices sure as hell does. If you're so concerned about your cholesterol levels, what the hell are you doing in McDonald's during breakfast in the first place?
I also love when someone comes in from drive-thru and starts bitching at me, the person behind the register at the front counter, as if I had ANYTHING to do with what goes into bags in drive-thru. Matter of fact...
ATTENTION ALL BITCHERS: Not that I'm racist or anything, but being black does NOT under ANY CIRCUMSTANCES give you the right to be rude as all fuck to anyone who so much as mildly irritates you. A while back some big fatass black lady comes in and bellows "EXCUSE ME! [pointing at me] YEAH YOU! WHAT THE HELL IS UP WITH THIS ORDER? I WANT TO SEE THE MANAGER! [I try to find Steve, but he's in the bathroom and the only available manager is Vanessa, who speaks okay English at best. I tell her.] "[to Vanessa, who's busy in grill] EXCUSE ME, MA'AM! I AM WAITING FOR YOU! MMM-HMMM!" [Vanessa finishes whatever she's doing] "IS THIS HOW YOU SERVE YOUR FRIES? THEY COLD!" [The woman had taken all damn day to pull up to the window, the fries were sitting there waiting for her, of course they're cold, damn it.] "IS THIS HOW YOU SERVE YOUR DRINKS? THERE'S NO ICE IN HERE!" [The ice had most likely melted while we were waiting for you, either that or the automatic drink/ice dispenser had missed the cup because it's so damn small and the DT people didn't notice.] "[Bitch bitch bitch, on and on and on]" Had she been reasonably polite and just told me what was wrong with her order instead of insisting on seeing a manager and being all bitchy and loud, she wouldn't have spent half as much time in there and we'd have all been much happier. Had we all been black, I doubt she would have been such a huge bitch. I've seen a lot of fat white people on the other side of the counter, but they NEVER act like that.
Another time, we ran out of sausage during breakfast. (Don't ask me why.) Some redneck white-trash guy comes in and asks for a sausage something-or-other, and Bianca tells him there's no sausage until we get a box from another store. His response (bear in mind that he had a kid in his arms, and another one standing with him): "WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT? YOU DON'T HAVE ANY FOOD, AND YOU DON'T HAVE ANY COMPETENT PEOPLE EITHER? THIS IS FUCKING STUPID!" Because, you know, when you swear at counter people they magically develop the ability to pull sausage out of the air, just for you, and also when the managers don't order enough sausage it's always because the counter people are incompetent.
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